This is my life........................5

Speaking of faith and prayer, I just wanted to let you all know. I don’t really believe in God. Before you shout like mad, hear my reason o!! I haven’t always been this way.

I was a bonafide strong christian at some point in my life. An experience i had made me this way.

I remember the day i gave my life. Uncle Deji invited my brother and i to church. Since getting to Nigeria i have never been awed by ‘church’ as i was that day. From the ushers by the door, down to the choir members and everyone i saw. I was awed. I wanted to be them. What ever they had that made them so cool, i wanted that.

By the time Pastor Paul came on to the pulpit i was a convert. I gave my life to Christ that very same day. Suddenly it was the in thing to be a Christian. I had found my home.

But something happened to me. Please don’t judge me. It wasn’t my fault. I was attending JAMB lessons like anyone else. I went to buy a snack down the road because i skipped breakfast.

A green Toyota stopped beside me. This guy in a suit popped his head out of the window and said ‘Sorry to disturb you aunty but i am looking for a conference centre. I am a Ghanaian preacher here for a conference and it seems my driver is lost. Could you please gimme directions?’

I don’t know anywhere here and haven’t heard of a conference’ i said. Sorry can’t help you.
On my way back the same car stopped once more beside me. The man said, ‘the conference is somewhere on Adeniyi Jones in Ikeja. 'Get in the car and take me there.

That was it. I lost total control of my body and actions. I was like a spirit hovering and shouting to my body to take control back from this man but i wasn’t strong enough. The long and short is they were robbers and asked me to take them to my house. They asked who would be home and i told them my brother. I had 5 mins to get him out or he was dead.

I entered the house like a ghost. I told Tyrone that i was really sick and felt like eating Gala. The only shop that sold it was a 20mins walk from the house so he was really pissed. He refused at first but caved in when i started getting hysterical.

After robbing the whole house they took me with them once more. My spirit screamed, prayed, cursed. All to no avail. After raping my entranced body, they dumped me under the overhead bridge between ojota and ketu. I was like a zombie or a mad person.

A woman was walking by and she saw me. She walked up to me and asked me where i lived. ‘Alapere’ i said. My first words of my own violation. She walked me to ketu and put me in a bus. She paid the conductor and gave him a tip to make sure he got me off at the right bus stop.

On getting home, everyone looked so glad to see me. I felt so worthless, so used and abused. Why are you happy to see me?
I have given away all your valuables.
You should hate me.
Instead they accepted me with open arms and no questions asked. My family were not Christian but they gave me the unconditional love it took to heal.
God wasn’t there for me. When i cried throughout the ordeal for salvation where was he?
If he were real he would have done something right?
For days i raged about this but then i moved on.
I never went back to church. I felt all i might get would be pity. This was no testimony. I never really heard anyone in church confess to anything bad at all.
They would think it were me who did something to invite the ordeal.
For me to believe again i will need some proof from the man himself and an apology for my pain and suffering.
Please don’t judge me. My reasons are understandable.
So now my skeletons are out enough of this talk.

Let’s get back to Akin....................................